October 11, 2012

NFL Week 6 Point Spread Breakdown


LAST WEEK: 5-9-0 | SEASON: 21-22-1, 48.8%

Steelers (-5.5) v. Titans
I would love to take the points on the home ‘dog, but the Titans’ specialty this season is getting absolutely smoked by everyone they play, with the exception of the circus win they had over the confused Lions. I’m definitely not buying into the Steelers, since they seem to be coasting by on reputation at this point, but the Titans are clown shoes all the way. Pick: STEELERS (-5.5)

Bengals (-1.5) v. Browns
The Browns are screaming toward a two-win season — if things go their way a couple of times — so it’s almost hard to believe this spread is real. The Bengals are bouncing around the league like an empty Big Gulp in a Formula One race car. They win, they lose, but not in a way that requires any attention. Usually, the exceptionally bad teams wait until weeks 11-16 to pick up their few measly wins, but this game against the Bengals could be the one that the Browns have circled. Pick: BROWNS (+1.5)

Colts v. Jets (-3)
There is no way the Colts can keep this up for long. Pick: JETS (-3)

Chiefs v. Buccaneers (-3.5)
Schiano is frantically trying to get “blowing up the victory formation” into the first-half game plan. Here’s hoping he’s successful. Pick: BUCCANEERS (-3.5)

Raiders v. Falcons (-8.5)
The Falcons are going to suffer an unexpected loss very soon. This could be it. Pick: RAIDERS (+8.5)

Cowboys v. Ravens (-3.5)
The Ravens have been unimpressive of late. The Cowboys are consistently inconsistent. Pick: COWBOYS (+3.5)

Lions v. Eagles (-4.5)
The Eagles are always fucking things up, but it’s been working out for them as underdogs. As favorites? I don’t see it. Pick: LIONS (+4.5)

Rams v. Dolphins (-3.5)
I want so badly to not believe in the Dolphins, but if they keep winning I’m going to have to come to terms with some things. Pick: DOLPHINS (-3.5)

Patriots (-3.5) v. Seahawks
The Seahawks’ D is Big Time, but overall Seattle can’t be for real. Pick: PATRIOTS (-3.5)

Bills v. Cardinals (-5)
I want so badly for the Bills to be competitive, but I’m too goddamn old to believe in Santa Claus. Pick: CARDINALS (-5)

Vikings v. Redskins (-2.5)
The Redskins are favored? Free points! Pick: VIKINGS (+2.5)

Giants v. 49ers (-4.5)
I think this line might be a misprint, but I’m going to run with it like an ATM just gave me an extra $10,000. Pick: GIANTS (+4.5)

Packers v. Texans (-4)
There’s been something off about this Packers team, but the Texans are too boring to exert their dominance on national TV. Pick: PACKERS (+4)

Broncos v. Chargers (-2)
The Battle of the Wishy-Washy Teams. The Broncos are a little more Washy, while the Chargers are slightly more Wishy. Pick: BRONCOS (+2)

Robb Witmer Full (@robbwitmer) is going to figure out this damn National Football League if it kills him.