January 4, 2012

The Second Coming of Kordell Stewart

PUSHMASTER PICKS '011: WEEK EIGHTEEN

By ROBB WITMER FULL    

THIS PASS WILL END UP ON THE GROUND SOMEWHERE.


WEST VIRGINIA (+3) v. Clemson
This game could go thirty points in either direction. Take the ‘dog.

KANSAS ST. (+8) v. Arkansas
Arkansas was the third best team in their division, so there’s that.

Lions v. Saints OVER (59)
This pick definitely falls into the “too obvious to be right” category, but I can’t help myself.

STEELERS (-9) v. Broncos
Last week I referred to Tim Tebow as “about the tenth or eleventh best quarterback in the conference...” I regret the error. Maybe I was still a little delirious from being sick, or from the subsequent dose of medication. The reality is that he’s probably the worst starting quarterback in the league not on the Bears roster. Tebow would be the second- or third-best quarterback on just about any team in the league. In fact, he’s probably the worst quarterback with at least eight consecutive starts since Kordell Stewart. Wait, what hell am I talking about? Kordell was a better passer, a better runner, and his fans were infinitely less nauseating. I think it’s funny when people say stuff like “the Broncos should put Tebow in at running back.” That’s fucking stupid. Sure, running the ball is what he’s failed at the least, but to be an elite running back requires a skill set Tebow simply doesn’t have. He might be a decent Wildcat-QB or short-yardage back for a few plays a game, but otherwise has no business being on an NFL field. And I still stand by my assertion that he was a just-above-average college quarterback. If it wasn’t for ESPN, you wouldn’t be able to remember the difference between him and Chris Leak.

ALABAMA (+1) v. Lsu
I’m surprised that Bovada still has LSU favored in this game. Everyone else has adjusted their lines the other way, and I’m assuming there’s a reason for that. Though if ‘Bama wins this game, doesn’t LSU still have a legitimate claim to part of the National Championship? What would be the difference in their seasons? Ugh. When will my beloved College Football put an end to this bullshit?

BOVADA.lv, 11:08 AM MST, Wednesday


Robb Witmer Full has managed to claw his way back to a 37-45-3 record in the PushMaster Invitational Football Pool, which he is probably gushing about all over the Twitterverse.